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TechnoratiMy custom is to work with one or two individuals, approved by all sides, to whom I can look to help further define reality for me in that setting. I do this even though I have a fairly comprehensive understanding about that congregation. I recognize that every church has its own distinct, characteristics and practices which I might otherwise miss without local eyes.
Each party will be given the opportunity to tell his or her "story." Differences of opinion will be aired. From seemingly irreconcilable positions, we examine the underlying interests that need to be satisfied for mutually acceptable and forward-looking agreements to be reached. Factors contributing to the problem, such as organizational structure, culture, communication patterns, and individual behavior will be addressed. Strains in interpersonal relationships will also be examined with a view toward providing a non-coercive opportunity for reconciliation.
Let me quickly add, though this may come across as being very cut-and-dried or formulaic, it is anything but. From my perspective, the work can be exhausting. On the other hand, it can also be about as rewarding an endeavor that one can engage in. I have experienced the blessings Jesus speaks of in Matthew 5:9 when he said, “blessed are the peacemakers.”
What are the biblical reasons for what you do?
Far too often, Matthew 18:15-17 is appealed to as the model to follow for all church conflict. I respectfully disagree. Matthew 18 is divinely applicable for issues relating to sin. It is inappropriately applied if used to reconcile broken relations over differences of opinion over goals, methods, priorities, resources, style, etc. To introduce a church judicial process that requires one to win and the other to lose over issues where no moral transgressions are involved is a recipe for disaster.
Though the New Testament does not provide a step-by-step process for resolving differences of opinion, it does have a pattern that reflects God's heart. In Matthew 5:9, Jesus taught, "Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God." To be a son of God means to exhibit the characteristics of God. The question for us therefore becomes, "If we are to be like God in making peace with others, how does God make peace with us?
The answer is, through a mediator. 1 Timothy 2:5 reads, “For there is one God, and there is one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus.”
The concept of mediation is inherently part of the fabric of the Old and New Testaments. In the OT, the concept of a mediator between people and God is a role played out again and again in Israel’s history through: (1) its priests, who served as indispensable mediators between God and the Israelites in worshipping God as prescribed in the Mosaic law, (2) its prophets, who stood in the place of God to reveal His word and will to the Israelites as well as the surrounding Gentile nations, and (3) its kings who, in Israel’s theocracy, were charged to serve as God’s viceroys administrating justice and righteousness according to the laws God gave to Moses. These three offices, priest, prophet, and king, all mediatorial in nature, were established by God to maintain the nation’s unique relationship with Him. This pattern, of course, continues right into the New Testament through the mediatorial work of Jesus. Continue »
