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'I'm Having Their Baby' Stars Encourage Adoption

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By Sami K. Martin , Christian Post Reporter
July 17, 2013|10:42 am
  • I'm Having Their Baby - Tory
    (Photo: Courtesy Oxygen Network)
    Tory from "I'm Having Their Baby"
  • I'm Having Their Baby - Alexa
    (Photo: Courtesy Oxygen Network)
    Alexa from "I'm Having Their Baby"
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"I'm Having Their Baby" is a reality show on Oxygen that features the true stories of women considering adoption for their babies. The show is in it's second season, and The Christian Post spoke with two mothers, Alexa and Tory, about their experiences on the show and how their faith played a role in their decision to explore adoption.

"I wanted to give my daughter a home with two parents," Alexa told the CP. "I chose to be on the show because going through the process myself and seeing all my peers who weren't parents was lonely. I didn't see a lot of people my age advocating for adoption."

"I wanted to tell my story, which was pro-life," Tory said. "I considered having an abortion, but then I decided to go with adoption. But I wanted to tell my story to try and help others, and I think that I did."

Out of the 22 birth mothers to be featured in season two, 9 of the women used religious affiliated adoption agencies. The production company works with multiple religious affiliated adoption agencies. Only four of the birth mothers from this season worked with Bethany Christian.

In addition to Bethany Christian, the other religious affiliated adoption agencies the production company worked with include Lifetree Adoptions, Lutheran Family Services, A Child's Hope and Bundle of Hope.

"I initially worked with a non-Christian agency and received no support," Tory explained. "Then I switched to Bethany Christian Services and that was much better. I could pray with my counselor and I received the support I needed."

Alexa was actually able to meet Caitlyn Lowell from the "Teen Mom" series; the adoption agency set the two up since Caitlyn had given her daughter up for adoption as well.

"She is a good role model for the adoptive process. Bethany Christian Services made that happen… I owe them so much," Alexa said.

Faith played a huge role in Tory and Alexa's decisions to place their children up for adoption. Tory, however, chose to parent her daughter at the last minute and says that God told her that everything would be okay and that she could handle parenting the baby.

"I struggled with the reason 'why' it was happening," Alexa said of her unplanned pregnancy, "but that God wouldn't have put me in this place if He didn't have a reason for doing so. He gave me a voice and a story and He wants me to share it. It was God's timing. One thing they didn't show on the show was that before we left the hospital, we all (the adoptive parents, Alexa, and the adoption counselors) got in a group circle and prayed. That was a pretty big piece of us leaving."

What is one piece of advice Tory and Alexa would give prospective parents?

"Definitely consider adoption over abortion. The process was so extremely stressful. I know that if I would have aborted, it would have been a very different experience. A lot of people have the wrong idea of adoption, that it's closed or they won't see their babies once they give them up, but that's not the truth," Tory said.

"Adoption has changed," Alexa added. "It's such a positive thing – people are still stuck in the mindset that adoption is an ending, but it's really a beginning. When I first found out I was pregnant, I was that cliché of 'my life is over,' but now, one year later, I realize that my life is just beginning. I think the show really covers the adoption process well."

Tory is now engaged to her daughter's father and is working to become a registered nurse. She and her fiancée attend church regularly and are very happy raising daughter Bryleigh. Tory is also close with the intended adoptive mother Sarah, who just adopted a son of her own, Ezra. Alexa is also looking forward to going back to school in the fall and has an open relationship with her daughter and adoptive parents Courtney and Brian.

"I'm Having Their Baby" airs Wednesday nights at 10:00 p.m. ET on Oxygen.

To learn more about Bethany Christian Services, visit www.bethany.org.

 

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