Comedian Rob Delaney is so broken over Kim Kardashian's failed marriage to Kris Humphries that he has decided to help them save their marriage – by suing the couple for $18 million.
"I'm suing Kim Kardashian and Ryan Seacrest and E! Entertainment Television and Comcast for perpetrating what we now know to be a hoax, their marriage," he told MTV News on Tuesday. "It can't be real. I want them to stay married. I want them to stick it out, so as an incentive, I am suing them for monetary damages – but only $18 million, not a lot. That's just what she was paid for the wedding episodes themselves."
Delaney said he was surprised by the divorce announcement after only 72 days of marriage because Kardashian and Humphries had renewed their vows on the "Ellen" show on the 60th day of their marriage.
"What happened in those 12 days? It must have been bad," he said.
Delaney also told MTV News that he has some marriage advice for Kardashian and Humphries.
"I will say, as someone who is married, that you are going to go through periods where you hate your spouse for 12 days - longer," he said. That's like a blip, and then you recover, and you figure it out together and figure out what the problem was and you grow, and these things that seem insurmountable and awful, you realize they made you stronger."
Despite the $18 million lawsuit, Delaney insists that he is not simply after money and genuinely wants to help.
"I want Kim to be happy," Delaney said. "I don't hate her. She's a person who deserves happiness, but you have to fight and work for it. As a married man and a dad and an American, I want to make her reconsider. I don't want the money. I mean, I'm going to take the money, but I feel like almost anybody would spend it better [than she would]."
When MTV News asked if his lawsuit would be taken seriously, Delaney said that, historically, the law is on his side.
"In America, you can kind of do whatever you want with the law. Michele Bachmann is a lawyer, the Supreme Court decided [the presidency] in 2000, so there's a tradition here that I feel supports me. The Supreme Court, for example would be behind me."
Delaney jokingly insists that his lawsuit is "deadly serious," but even if he does not win the $18 million settlement, there could be other benefits.
"I'm not totally insane, so I know that this might not come to fruition exactly how I envision it," he said. "But if we can get a few more people, if we can get a 12-year-old girl watching ['Keeping Up With the Kardashians"] to think, 'You know what? Kim Kardashian is a very awful role mode and I shouldn't watch that show.' Literally, if one girl in, let's say, North Dakota, sees this and says that, then we won. That's worth more than $18 million, certainly."