People looked up to David and he liked it. In fact, he didn't know it but one of the reasons he was drawn to the ministry was to serve his big ego. He relished the complimentary remarks about his sermons. He loved the adulation and it really made him defensive when someone criticized something he said or the way he said it.
They didn't realize what they were doing, but some of David's parishioners were reinforcing a false image he had of himself. He was different – somehow above the ordinary guy.
This is why David had incredible guilt feelings about the way he would lose his temper and swear when no one could hear him. Sometimes he would feel lusts for the women who would come to his study with stories of inattentive and insensitive husbands. A preacher ought not to have such weaknesses, he thought.
At times, David would feel terribly anxious about himself. When things were going well at the church and home, he felt like he could fly. But when people seemed indifferent to him, when the kids were sick, when his wife was too busy to respond to him sexually, he would feel this profound compulsion to run – just get away. Everything was beginning to close in on him, until he was consumed with a sickening depression.