I'm truly sorry you've been experiencing so much internal pain, and I agree with you that the thing that has sustained you has been the grace of God. And I appreciate how open you've been about your struggles. That can't have been easy to do.
But in the midst of your struggles, you're sending an important message to all your fans: All the riches and fame and popularity in the world can't buy you true happiness or inner contentment.
To go to sleep at night without sleeping pills, being at peace with God and yourself, to get up in the morning full of excitement for the new day, to live with a sense of joyful purpose – no amount of money in the world can buy those things.
I know you grew up reading the Bible, so I hope you don't mind if I remind you of some verses you probably read as a child. "Better is a little with the fear of the LORD than great treasure and trouble with it" (Proverbs 15:16). And, "Better is a dry morsel with quiet than a house full of feasting with strife" (Proverbs 17:1)
Do these make more sense to you now?
I read that Johnny Depp has a full-time staff of 40 that costs him $300,000 per month and that he spends $30,000 on wine every month. And he must be flooded with notes from his adoring fans on a daily basis. But I bet he'd be the first to tell you that he has more inner turmoil than inner peace.
Your friend Miley Cyrus recently said that she sees herself as "genderless" and "ageless" and "not divided by human being, even animals. There's no me and them and there's no us and you," she said. "I just want to be nothing."
Do you think she's doing better since she gave up her gospel roots?
Katy, wouldn't it be wonderful to know some of the innocence you once enjoyed as a child? Wouldn't it be incredible to recapture the sense of safety you once felt in your heavenly Father's arms?
You can have that again, but you need to fall into those arms afresh – not holding on to your own agenda, not holding on to some of the fleshly things that brought you fame, not holding on to your control of the future. You must simply take the plunge and say, "God, I'm totally yours, body, soul, and spirit. Wash me clean with the blood of Jesus, and give me a brand new start."
It's not just a matter of going back to the old, since you probably have a mixed view of your upbringing. It's a matter of going forward.
If you do this, you will never be the same – and you will never regret it.
I've been married for 41 years now, and my wife Nancy and I met when we were both just 19 years old. We are fulfilled and content and in love, and it's been a wonderful journey so far. How much would you pay to have a lasting, healthy relationship like this?
Obviously, there are millions of men who would do anything to spend an hour with you, let alone be in a relationship with you, but you know that relationships can't be bought and sold. Wouldn't it be amazing to be in a satisfying, long-term relationship where you felt secure, loved, and affirmed, without having to look over your shoulder to see the latest babe after your man? That's the kind of relationship the blessing of God can bring.
I saw a story the other day about the newest gorgeous girlfriend of Leonardo Di Caprio, and when I saw it, I felt sad for him.
Sad, you say? Why feel sad for him?
It's because I doubt he has as much contentment with his bevy of beauties as a godly man, married to a godly woman, the father of three great kids. Perhaps that mom can't wear a bikini after giving birth to those little ones. And perhaps that dad doesn't have the looks or charisma or bucks that Leonardo has. But they have something far more priceless: a wonderful family and a committed relationship. And they have lasting love. Isn't that what you long for too?
I know that even godly people sometimes need psychiatric help, and I'm certainly not criticizing you for getting that help. I simply want to remind you that there is a better way, and that way is found in the simplicity of following Jesus.
Sexual flings and tens of millions of followers and endless riches will never calm the storm that is churning in your heart. Only Jesus can give you true peace, and He offers it to you as a free gift. You just need to lose everything to receive that gift – to say goodbye to Katy Perry and goodbye to everything that degrades your real purpose and calling.
It's time to find new life at the foot of the cross where, in a moment of time, every drop of guilt and uncleanness and shame will disappear for good. Think of feeling totally clean!
You said, "I so badly want to be Katheryn Hudson that I don't even want to look like Katy Perry anymore sometimes — and, like, that is a little bit of why I cut my hair because I really want to be my authentic self."
But I'm sure you know that cutting your hair doesn't affect your soul. You need a heart transformation.
Many people are praying for you, Katheryn, and God is ready to answer their prayers. What's stopping you from surrendering?