The downside of ambition and hustle
Have you ever watched one of those reality television talent shows and seen a contestant come out to perform who clearly is out of his or her league? Like me, do you ever think, What on earth made her think singing on that stage was a good idea?
So many people have bought into the lie that we can be anything we want to be. With enough hard work and confidence, we can create any reality we imagine for ourselves.
This kind of self-driven ambition can be the beginning of a life marked by persistent manipulations and countless disappointments. Abner was this kind of man.
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When we begin 2 Samuel, we learn that King Saul is dead. Any time there is the death of a king, there is usually a scramble for power and position. Second Samuel 3 begins to reveal the selfish ambition that will be Abner’s downfall. Abner wants to make himself strong, so he sleeps with Saul’s concubine. To sleep with the concubine of a dead king was to assert oneself as the new leader. Abner is trying to take matters into his own hands.
Abner wanted to be all that he could be. He certainly didn’t lack confidence or vision. His desire was to make his own name great despite knowing that the Lord had appointed David to be the next king of Israel (v. 10). This is a dangerous condition of self-help. We can be very, very good at looking at where we are and reasoning that God put us here to take advantage of the situation. I don’t know that this is what Abner is doing, but I do know it’s what I do.
So many of us have quoted the phrase, “God helps those who help themselves.” In fact, many assume it’s actually a verse in the Bible, which it is not. In church-girl circles where we have been trained to do our part, serve the kingdom, and sacrifice for others, women have become really, really good at doing more than our part in the name of Jesus. Because, as we say, “God helps those who help themselves.”
But as we will see with the story of Abner, God usually doesn’t help those who help themselves. Call it what you want, but that kind of selfish ambition, hustle, or control usually gets folks into trouble. (Believe me, I know.) The truth is that God helps those who cannot help themselves! He leans in to help those who have stepped into a God-assignment bigger than they can handle. God helps those who have surrendered their ability to control or manipulate a situation. That’s the place where God steps in.
This is not that kind of story, however.
Ish-Bosheth, Saul’s son, confronts Abner for this offense. While Abner doesn’t deny sleeping with the concubine, his lack of denial is confirmation of his sin. Abner simply asserts his loyalty to David. This is the danger of selfish ambition and self- determination. Driven by desire and confidence, Abner tries to hide his real motives and refuses to admit the truth when he is caught.
Evidence that Abner’s manipulation is working, Ish-Bosheth fears Abner and drops the matter. Emboldened by his newfound authority, Abner now goes to David with a plot to try and worm his way into David’s inner circle. While David treats him warmly and graciously, David is not naïve. He has not been duped. Second Samuel will chronicle David’s extreme loyalty to all of Saul’s household.
Abner’s actions toward David don’t accomplish what Abner so desperately desired.
It would be easy to read this passage and think Abner is just transitioning his loyalty from Saul to David. Any one of these circumstances alone may not indict Abner. But collectively, this passage paints a picture of Abner as a man plagued by selfish ambition that would ultimately be his downfall. Yes, “Abner had been strengthening his own position in the house of Saul” (2 Sam. 3:6).
There is much for us to learn from Abner about ambition and hustle. Abner and David give us two competing pictures of how selfish ambition is never enough to change God’s predetermined purpose for each person.
Selfish ambition falls under the umbrella of self-help. It promises what we cannot deliver but depends on us to do it anyway. Sanctification promises what we cannot deliver but trusts God to do it in spite of us. Self-help manipulates others to strengthen our position. Sanctification allows us not to worry about what others’ motivations or manipulations are. Like David, we can be gracious because God will do what is right. David was able to be gracious with Abner because he knew the Lord was in control of David’s future. Finally, selfish ambition looks out for self while godly ambition is focused on the glory of God.
Ambition in and of itself isn’t wrong. We ought to want to be all that God created us to be and to do all that God created us to do. Godly ambition rests in God’s sovereignty. But our motives will tell us if we are manipulating a plan or trusting God’s purpose. All the hustle in the world can’t get us farther than the hand of God can take us or has appointed for us to go.
Like Abner, I’ve been guilty of hustling to try and make something happen, or to position myself for God’s blessing. If I do this, God will do that, I’ve thought. There’s a tension there for sure. Sanctification is the process of making us holy, set apart for God. It is the only cure for being sick of me. Only God can do what is needed to make us whole and healthy. He prescribes the medicine, but we have to take it.
Adapted from Whitney Capps' debut book, Sick of Me: From Transparency to Transformation.
