Once the darling of Hollywood, Lindsay Lohan told Oprah Winfrey on a special episode that premiered on the OWN network last night that she was ready to take ownership of her life after troubles with alcohol and drugs had repeatedly derailed it.
"Are you now ready, at this time in your life, to heal whatever it is that's kept you from being who you need to be?" Winfrey asked.
"I'm working on it," said Lohan. "It's a process and I continue to do it every day."
Lohan, who has become a tabloid regular after multiple DUIs, stints to rehab, and arrests, spoke about being raised in a "chaotic" home, her "drug of choice," and about if she blamed her parents for her actions.
For Lohan, her drinking habits fueled her future drug behavior.
"In the past [alcohol] was a gateway to other things for me. I tried cocaine with alcohol," said Lohan. "I've done it like 10-15 times…I've never felt good the next day."
While Lohan attributed her "chaotic" childhood and an "addiction to chaos" as catalysts for her substance problems, she refused to blame her parents for any role in her actions.
"I love my parents," she said. "They're just parents, really, at the end of the day. And trying to stand up for their daughter and themselves."
Lohan expressed both regret and resignation at the ups and downs of her life.
"I've lived so many lives in one lifetime at this point," she said. "And it's not interesting to me anymore."
Lohan will be the subject of an OWN network eight episode docu-series that will cover the star attempting to resurrect her career.