Sex is more than just a physical act. There is also a deep spiritual aspect to sex. But you probably knew that already, didn't you? Or at least you may have had an inkling of it in your soul.
Whenever two bodies engage in sex, their souls are also united. Why would that be? Well....simply put, God made sex. You and I didn't create it. If you were only a body and not also a soul, then sex would only be physical. Memo to you: "Your soul is immortal and will never cease to exist, no matter what you do with your body." So....we don't get to dictate to God where the boundaries for sex are to be set. That's His call, and His alone.
You have probably heard the saying, "He who has the gold makes the rules." That may often be the way it plays out on earth, but I have another one for you. "He who created man's body and soul gets to establish the sexual boundaries of right and wrong." I am talking about a universal code of conduct that is not based on your strongest sexual desires, but rather, upon God's authoritative Word.
What makes one sexual relationship right and the other wrong has nothing to do with personal preferences. It has everything to do with how the Creator defines it and where He set the bar when He made sex. When man in essence attempts to lower God's bar and ignore God's commands, his soul suffers even more than his body. That is a fact, not because I say it or you say it....but because God has clearly addressed the issue of sexual conduct in the Scriptures.
Sex is occurring right now among many people all over the world. When two people engage in sex, their physical bodies are obviously in one specific geographic location. It is a location which is visible to the human eye. On the other hand, their two souls are in a "place" that is invisible to the human eye.
So where is that place that souls go during sex? Actually, there are three places souls can go....and only three. While their bodies are united in a visible geographic location, their souls are united in an invisible place....but a place that is, nevertheless, just as real.
The first place two souls can go also happens to be the one place God designed for souls to go during sex. The Bible calls this place "the marriage bed." This is the place where a man and woman who are married go when they have sex. Whether they are in their actual bedroom or not....or perhaps even away on a trip...."the marriage bed" is the place where their souls connect with one another during sex. It is a spiritual union and it is one of the many blessings of marriage.
God's Word says, "Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral." (Hebrews 13:4) This is the only way your soul can enjoy "safe sex." It is the only place God has sanctioned and chosen to bless. The other two places where many souls connect during sex will bring a curse and not a blessing.
The second place, or spiritual location, where many souls engage in sex is in "church." That's right....the temple of the Lord. I am not talking about a church building. The New Testament never uses the word "church" to describe a building. For the past 2000 years, the "church" has been the physical bodies and souls of Christians. "Don't you know that you yourselves are God's temple and that God's Spirit lives in you?" (1 Cor. 3:16)
Here is the image I encourage you to lock into your mind. Picture yourself having sex right up in the front of your church sanctuary....right where the pastor delivers God's Word to the people. Hold that image in your mind....because in God's eyes, when a born again person has sex outside of marriage....the two souls are united in "church" right there in God's presence.
Every believer in Jesus Christ is "in church" 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. You never leave church. Your body never stops being a temple of the Holy Spirit. Everything you do as a believer is being done "in church." Would you as a Christian ever engage in sexual immorality in your church building? I am guessing you would never be that brazen. Well....when a believer engages in this behavior anywhere, his body is in one location and his soul is "in church" right in front of God.
The Bible says, "Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body." (1 Cor. 6:18-20) There is nothing honorable about committing sexual sin in church.
We've now seen two of the three spiritual places people can have sex....the marriage bed, and the church. It's time to consider the third and only other place where two souls can meet when engaging in sex.
Jesus made it clear that there are only two roads leading into eternity....a narrow road to heaven....and a wide road to hell. (see Matthew 7:13,14) Hell is described by our Lord as a place where "the fire never goes out." (Mark 9:48) Perhaps it is just like fire on earth....or perhaps it is far worse. Either way, imagine a person who does not know Jesus and is therefore on the road to hell. Picture that person living everyday on the rim of a volcano....walking around it....hanging out.....only a breath away from entering it forever.
Now imagine that unbeliever having a bed sitting right on the rim of the volcano. Whenever that unbeliever has sex, he or she is as close to falling into the volcano as you can get. This is the third place that two souls can meet to have sex. When two people who do not know Christ engage in sex, this is their "bed" and it is dangling on the rim of the volcano. If they only knew that their sexual act could be their final act before dying and entering hell for eternity.
"Can a man scoop fire into his lap without his clothes being burned? Can a man walk on hot coals without his feet being scorched? So is he who sleeps with another man's wife; no one who touches her will go unpunished." (Proverbs 6:27-29)
By the way, even married couples who are unbelievers are on the rim of the volcano during sex. You may say, "But they are married. I thought that is what God wanted. They are not sinning by having sex in marriage, right?" Well....in their case, there is a bigger sin being committed. It trumps their sexual relationship in marriage. It is the sin of unbelief. It is the one sin that keeps a person's soul living on the rim of a volcano, so to speak. Without Christ in your life, even sex in marriage cannot save your soul or the soul of your spouse. Jesus is the only One who can rescue us from our sin and bring us to heaven.
So there are the three places that souls can have sex. The first one is good, holy, and God-pleasing....it is the marriage bed....and it is God's plan. The second one is scandalous....where a believer engages in sex outside of marriage, and therefore, is committing sexual sin in God's church. And thirdly, many souls engage in sex on the rim of a volcano due to their unbelief in Christ as their Savior.
There is no fourth option. Every human being has a soul, and everyone who has sex does so in one of these three places. When this life is over, sex may be over. There is nothing in the Bible that says we will have sex in heaven. Actually, our experiences in paradise will far exceed anything we have experienced on earth. Just because God made sex doesn't mean that He hasn't made something even better for His children to enjoy together.
The joy...the fellowship....the ecstasy....and the praise of heaven will far exceed any sexual experience on earth. I suggest that you choose to trust your Creator on this one....and on everything else He has said in His Word....unless of course you think that you are smarter than God on things like sex, marriage, and eternity.
If and when you have sex in the future, you would be wise to imagine where your soul will go during the sexual experience. Picture yourself in "the marriage bed" if you are a Christian couple; or in church, if you are a believer who is planning to sin sexually; or on the rim of a volcano, if you don't yet trust Christ as your Savior. People often spend much time planning the physical surroundings for their intimate interludes. But how many people are aware of their spiritual surroundings during sex? God provides "spiritual protection" for anyone who truly wants to engage in "safe sex."
In other words, don't just jump into bed with someone until you are aware of where your soul will be at during your sexual experience. You don't have to sacrifice your soul for eternity upon the altar of sexual satisfaction. Surrender your sexual desires to Christ....as well as your entire heart....and believe that He died for all of your sins on the cross....and you will escape the fire of hell and be saved to live in the paradise of heaven.
"Safe sex" in "the marriage bed" keeps you from swerving off the narrow road....and that is the only safe road into eternity. The Lord takes this sex stuff so seriously because He takes our bodies so seriously. That is why St. Paul urged believers "to offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God - this is your spiritual act of worship." (Romans 12:1)
That brings everything full circle. Even many unbelievers, if they were honest, would admit that they are trying to find a spiritual high through sex and not only physical pleasure. Do you know why they feel that way? Because God designed our bodies to be used to His glory as a spiritual act of worship. The body and soul are not really two separate entities, but are intertwined with one another into this one person God calls "you."
Hey you....one final thought. You never again need to fall for the lie that sex is only physical. You may have always known in your heart that sex has a deep spiritual reality to it, but you might have been afraid to admit it. Hey....you're human....we are often afraid of things we don't understand.
It's easier to bury our head (and our soul) in the sand and just do what feels good. Unfortunately, plenty of things in life which feel good happen to have horrible consequences. At the end of the day, you can bow to your feelings, or you can make your feelings bow to the Lord. Either way, your soul hangs in the balance. I bet you would never sell your body for sex....but would you sell your soul for sex?