Pastor John Gray has received much criticism after a short video clip of him speaking about wives seeking validation from their husbands during the Girl Talk segment at MegaFest in Dallas, Texas, last week went viral.
In previous years, Girl Talk featured women who shared wisdom with other women but this year they added a "man cave" section to get men's perspective on relationship issues. Pastor John Gray was among the men featured, and in a clip posted on social media the Lakewood Church pastor is seen sharing his response to a question about whether or not women should seek or need the validation of a man, specifically their husband.
"Every woman in here at some point wants a man to come home and say, baby here is $1,000 go get your nails done, get your hair done," Gray shouted as everyone in attendance cheered.
He then went on to imply that a man who has made sure everything in his home is taken care of is hoping to have a romantic night with his wife.
"The bills are paid, the kids are covered, I've prayed over you, now handle your business, so we can have a nice night," Gray said, adding that God made the marital relationship so that a husband desires his wife and a wife desires her husband.
A post shared by Ms. B aka FirstLadyB (@_firstladyb) on Jul 2, 2017 at 4:47pm PDT
Although everyone in attendance seemed to enjoy the pastor's comments, Gray received some negative feedback about the video clip. According to Black Christian News Network One Gray decided to respond to his accusers by providing context to his statement.
"I wanted to add context to the video that's been posted. It's very interesting to me how fast some in the church are ready to vilify and judge something without proper context," Gray explained. "I was a part of a panel of men who offered perspective during the Girl Talk panel hosted by First Lady Serita Jakes and her daughters. The question was posed to the men as to whether or not women should need the validation of a man, particularly wives."
"My response was that wives MAY want to work, but there are times when some don't want to HAVE to work. As a husband it is my honor to give my wife the best that I have. And most husbands would say the same," he added. "This SHORT clip is designed to get people to go to see the entire conversation. But I've noticed how fast things get taken out context, which is what some people want to do anyway. Some people want to disqualify you from the public discourse because they never liked me anyway. Doesn't change what God is doing in my life. But responsibility says to offer clear context to the video which I neither edited or saw before it was sent out."
Gray married his wife, Aventer, in December 2011 and said he believes a man should pamper their spouse.
"The point I made was clear — if you have a wife, spoil her, honor her and reverence her. And whether that's with expressions of gifts or consistent commitment, God will bless your union," he added. "Money isn't the deciding factor in honoring ones wife. Some women desire time spent, or dinner cooked. Other women do like gifts and that's fine too. Anyway, I'm done for now. God bless!"
To watch the Girl Talk segment at MegaFest in full, click here.