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Integrity: The Core of Male Leadership in the Family

Every man carries "The Mantle" of leadership for his family. When it comes to your family, you are "The Mantle" of leadership. It's your job – your duty – to surround and cover your wife and your children with love, affection, caring and spiritual leadership. God teaches us these Biblical truths in Timothy, Proverbs and Matthew. Let's look at what the Bible says about how we – God's men – should live our lives today with "The Mantle" of leadership.

In part three of "The Mantle" series we are going to look at the family. What are the words or expression of the family to one another and to other people? We are going to look at the core, connections, character, contribution, and communication of the family.

Jesus says watch over your heart with all diligence for it is the wellspring of life. Good things come out of the good man because of the good that is stored up in him. Evil things come out of the evil man because of the evil stored up in him.

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Credit : (Photo: ScoTTTokar)
(Photo: ScoTTTokar)

The solution to that conundrum and helping your own family is to love God and love people. We learned about that in catechism, in first grade and at Sunday school: love God and love people.

But what does it actually mean to have those core convictions as the center of your heart? What does it look like? It's kind of vague; painted with large strokes. Watch Jesus, see the red letters in the Gospels, and watch Him love God and love people.

What did it look like? It was simple convictions, aggressively applied. Whatever situation I'm in, whatever relationship I have myself in, whatever problems I encounter, the Son of God said, and the man of God says to himself: "I am going to choose to do that thing that shows love for God and people, period."

Simple convictions are applied in many ways. It doesn't matter if it's a prostitute ready to be stoned, or religious guys who put burdens on others , making people feel ashamed to be tax collectors. He's determined to do two things always: to show love for God, and to show love for people. Core convictions: many expressions. Let's say it together, core convictions: many expressions.

Now, what does loving God, and loving yourself in the home look like?

John 14:21 is where the rubber hits the road. So, Jesus loves me. What does that look like? I want you to apply this not "out there somewhere," but in your own heart and in your own home.

"Whoever has my commands and obeys them, he is the one who loves me, and he who loves me shall be loved by my Father, and He will give himself to you." Let's unpack this verse. Four words you see in this passage are possession, application, connection, and affirmation.

Jesus said, "If you love me, you will possess my priorities." He's my God. He loves me. My priorities are His priorities. We keep his commands not under compulsion or compliance, but because we love him. They are an expression of thanksgiving for what He did for us. For Him who died on our behalf, we are grateful, redeemed, and rescued. Jesus said these are our priorities because we love Him, who died for us. It's not a burden, it's a privilege.

We have to apply His commands. You know what that's called? It's called integrity, when you are undivided in what you believe and how you live. That's what loving the Lord looks like.

It starts with you, and then it's being modeled by you in the core of your household. Your family sees it. Daddy loves God and loves people because he sees and does what God says in spite of how hard it is, in spite of my temper tantrums, he leads the home and he loves mommy and he loves us and he listens to God and he does what God says.

Do you feel intimate with Jesus today? Do you feel like he is near or far? Are you loving the Lord? Are you doing what He says? Are you pursuing His will for your life? Are you fighting to be God's man? Are you fighting to be a brother? Are you fighting to grow? Are you fighting to serve the Lord? Are you willing to tell others about Him? Because when you fight for that in your own life, you will posses what you believe. When you do what He says you should do, Jesus promises a deeper revelation and closeness, more than you could ever dream of.

"I will show myself to you." If I do not love the Lord, I miss out on revelation by the disintegration in my relationship with Him and with others. When this happens, God reminds us that we have to get back with God. I have to get back to the center. That's the first key. We have to possess the core of the man, and then we can begin to make connection to what is at the core of the family.

God says you have the mantle of leadership in your home. That means your leadership style surrounds, covers, encapsulates, and leaks onto the people around you. What we have learned in this is that integrity in the home begins with the integrity of our heart.

Say it now: Integrity in the home begins with the integrity in my heart. What's going on in the inside always leaks to the outside. Our core, our heart, our convictions, our beliefs are all affected. Those are things that set the tone in our families, and all of our relationships.

The Bible says very clearly to us to get your core in order today, because it affects others.

How do we get our core in order? We need to change the object of worship to God, and His Son Jesus Christ. We need to put Him at the center of our lives, at the center of our relationships, and then place Jesus as Lord, as ruler of our hearts. We then make choices that show love for Him and love for people, like loving his Word, being connected with believers, serving the Lord, and sharing the Gospel.

Watch The Mantle Sessions where men's expert and pastor Kenny Luck helps you to learn how God's men are learning to take hold of their mantle.

Kenny Luck is the founder of Every Man Ministries and the men's pastor at Saddleback Church. His 20th book – SLEEPING GIANT: No Movement of God without Men of God - is a blueprint for men's ministries, and was released through B&H Publishing. Watch and read more of Kenny's teaching here at EveryManMinistries.com. EXPLORE: The "Media Vault" for related resources. Follow Every Man Ministries now on Facebook, Twitter (@everymm,) and YouTube.

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