Is it censorship when parents ask what books kids read at school?

What if your 12-year-old daughter came home from school one afternoon, visibly upset, and told you she was trans? What if you learned that an adult at school had encouraged her to question her identity and suggested she might not feel safe talking about it with you?

For Colorado mother Erin Lee, this wasn't hypothetical.

In 2021, Lee's daughter attended what she believed was an after-school art club. The gathering was actually a Gender and Sexualities Alliance meeting, where an adult presenter discussed gender identity and warned students about suicide risks among trans youth. According to the family's court filings, students were also told it might not be safe to discuss the meeting with their parents, and the presenter offered personal contact information so they could communicate privately.

Lee's daughter returned home in tears. The next day, her parents withdrew her from school. They later filed a federal lawsuit, which was dismissed on legal grounds.

What if that were your child?

We send our children to school trusting that teachers will educate them and respect our role as parents. We don't expect to be kept in the dark about what's happening in our children's lives at school.

Yet parents don't always know what their children are being exposed to, and they aren't always included in decisions that affect them. School library materials are one example.

When did protecting innocence become controversial?

A school library should be a place where children discover new ideas, explore their interests, and develop a love of reading. But some school libraries have also made books containing graphic sexual descriptions or illustrations available to young students.

In 2023, Fort Worth Independent School District removed several titles from elementary and middle school libraries, including Gender Queer, a graphic memoir containing illustrated sexual content. The district moved the books to a staff-only collection, where students could no longer access them. (Fort Worth Star-Telegram)

Parents routinely make decisions about what their children are ready to see and read. They may use filters to keep explicit material off the family computer and television screens, only to find that similar content is available in their child's school library.

Why should the standards parents set at home disappear when their children walk into school?

Some call restricting access to these books censorship. But deciding what belongs in an elementary or middle school library is not the same as banning a book for everyone. Adults can still read these titles. The question is whether every book belongs in front of every child, regardless of age.

This isn't about shielding children from every unfamiliar idea. It's about recognizing that some material is intended for adults, and children deserve the time and guidance to approach it when their parents believe they're ready.

Parents shouldn't be the last to know

At America's Women, we've established a Library Task Force to help public libraries and school districts develop clear policies for reviewing children's materials. Parents should know what's available to their children and have a clear way to raise concerns.

And we're seeing what can happen when parents speak up.

In Arizona, where our work began, the Maricopa County Library District introduced a parental choice program that lets families restrict access to specific books or collections on their children's library accounts. More than 50 books about sex education and puberty were also reportedly moved out of children's sections at county libraries following concerns raised by the community.

These changes show that libraries can respond to parents without preventing other adults from accessing the same books. That same respect for parents should extend to sensitive conversations about a child's identity. Students who are struggling with personal questions deserve compassion and support, but that shouldn't mean treating their parents as obstacles.

Nearly a century ago, the Supreme Court made clear in Pierce v. Society of Sisters that “the child is not the mere creature of the State.” Parents have a fundamental responsibility to guide their children's upbringing.

For Christian families, that responsibility is also rooted in Scripture. Deuteronomy 6:6–7 instructs parents to teach their children diligently. But you don't have to be a Christian to believe parents should have a meaningful voice in their children's education. It's common sense.

Their childhood. Our responsibility

Our children already encounter adult content on the phones in their pockets. We cannot control everything they see, but schools shouldn't unnecessarily add to that exposure.

Childhood innocence isn't about keeping children ignorant of the world. It's about allowing them to mature at an appropriate pace, guided by the people who know and love them.

Parents, find out what's in your child's school library. Ask how books are reviewed and understand the policies governing conversations about sensitive subjects. When something doesn't seem right, speak up. Don't assume someone else is protecting your child's innocence.

Someday, our children will be adults, ready to make their own decisions. Until then, they need us to recognize what they're not yet mature enough to navigate alone. They only get one childhood, and once it's gone, we cannot give it back.

Protecting that childhood isn't simply our right as parents. It's our responsibility.