Is therapy your love language?

Today, if you're even a little culturally fluent, you've heard a new kind of psychological language: "therapy-speak." Therapy-speak is the use of therapy or psychology terms in everyday conversations to explain almost everything — our feelings, relationships, or even conflicts. It can be helpful at times, but it can also sound enlightened while avoiding reality beyond your feelings.
Here is a taste of therapy speak:
"I need to process my emotions."
"I'm practicing self-care and self-love."
"I'm focusing on my personal growth."
"I need to honor my feelings."
"That's a microaggression."
How prevalent is therapy-speak?
One national study reported that outpatient psychotherapy use among US adults rose from 6.5% in 2018 to 8.5% in 2021. That's millions of people learning new vocabulary and bringing it into everyday conversations. [1]
By 2025, one extensive survey reported that nearly a quarter of Americans see a therapist, and many more planned to start therapy within the next year — especially Millennials and Gen Z. That's a lot of language moving from the counseling room to the kitchen table. [2] A 2025 Gen Z survey reported high rates of diagnosed and self-suspected conditions. More therapy, more content, more labels, more therapy-speak. [3]
Let me be clear: I'm not taking shots at psychology. I've spent decades sitting with people in therapy rooms, and therapy helps. Words matter. Being able to name panic, grief, trauma, compulsion, depression, and shame can bring relief. Sometimes a label doesn't imprison a person; it gives them a map. It says, "You're not crazy. There's a pattern here, and there's a path forward."
Where it starts to go sideways
Therapy-speak can make everyday life feel like a crisis — every rough patch becomes "trauma," every low mood becomes pathology, and every disagreement becomes harm. That is why I tell clients, in some form or another, "don't pathologize everything." Life is hard. Sometimes tragic. Sometimes unbearable. Not every hard thing needs a diagnostic label to be real.
Some people call this the "medicalization of everyday life." Regular human struggles are increasingly treated as disorders with treatment plans. Once therapy becomes weekly upkeep rather than targeted help, ordinary pains can start to look like symptoms that require professional naming.
But here's the deeper issue.
Psychological theory and labels can make you feel like "everything makes sense," which can be a relief. But a label isn’t the whole story of what it means to be human. If you call a glass of salty water "sugar water," you might feel happy for a second because you love sugar. But the second you drink it, reality sets you straight.
The same thing happens when we rename something to make ourselves feel better — calling selfishness "self-care" or avoidance "protecting my peace" is misleading.
Obviously, the goal isn't to throw labels away. It's to make sure our words match reality — and that our view of reality includes more than what's inside our heads. Otherwise, we end up managing life with better language while missing the larger purpose of being human.
This is where the words of Christ carry a different kind of weight. Not because Christianity is "better vocabulary," but because Jesus is the Word made flesh (John 1:1, 14). His words aren't merely descriptions of reality. They carry the authority of the One who made, entered, and will judge reality.
That changes what "healing words" means.
Christ doesn't speak like a therapist handing you a label. He talks like a Savior who can do something with what's broken. He weeps with the grieving (John 11:35). He names fear and calls people out of it (Matthew 6:25–34). He draws near to the crushed in spirit (Psalm 34:18). He invites the heavy-laden into rest that doesn't depend on their inner strength (Matthew 11:28–30).
Therapy can help you function. It can steady you, give you tools, and help you breathe again.
But Christianity makes a different claim — one that psychology cannot make. It offers salvation. Eternal life. It provides meaning that does not collapse when suffering and death arrive.
Jesus doesn't merely teach coping skills. He claims authority over the final enemy. He doesn't simply interpret suffering; He enters it and defeats the real enemy. "I am the resurrection and the life … whoever believes in me, though he die, yet shall he live" (John 11:25–26).
Because the resurrection is real, Jesus' words aren't merely encouragement for a better life on earth. His claims are anchored in an event — an empty tomb in the real world — declaring that death isn't ultimate and that suffering isn't meaningless. His words don't merely help you cope with grief and the grave. They conquer grief and the grave.
The apostle Paul put it bluntly: "And if Christ has not been raised, our preaching is useless and so is your faith" (1 Corinthians 15:14, NIV). That's not therapy language. That's resurrection language.
At the cross, God does not stand at a distance, offering commentary. He enters the human condition, bearing our sin and sorrow in His own body (Isaiah 53:4–6; 1 Peter 2:24). He meets us not only with empathy but also with redemption.
That's the power of the resurrection. It doesn't just say, "You can feel better." It says, "Everything will be made new" (Revelation 21:4–5). It doesn't just promise relief; it promises restoration — justice, reunion, and a world where death is gone, not merely managed.
The Gospel transcends any vocabulary of self-definition. It tells you who you are before you perform, how you can be forgiven when you're truly guilty, how you can endure when the story hurts, and why your suffering is not pointless — even when it isn't immediately fixable (Romans 5:3–5; 2 Corinthians 4:16–18).
Therapy and its language can make life manageable.
But the resurrection isn't management. It's victory.
Footnotes
[1] Olfson, M., et al. (2024).Trends in outpatient psychotherapy among adults in the US.JAMA Psychiatry.
[2] Thriveworks. (2025).Pulse on mental health report 2025(report). Thriveworks.
[3] Harmony Healthcare IT. (2025).State of Gen Z mental health(report). Harmony Healthcare IT.
Dr. David Zuccolotto is a former pastor and clinical psychologist. For 35 years he has worked for hospitals, addiction treatment centers, outpatient clinics and private practice. He is the author of The Love of God: A 70 Day Journey of Forgiveness.












