Wonder Project’s ‘It’s Not Like That’ cast talk hope, grief and pastoral loneliness

By Leah MarieAnn Klett, Assistant Editor Tuesday, January 27, 2026

NEW YORK — At the red carpet premiere of “It’s Not Like That,” the new faith-based show from Wonder Project, the cast and crew reflected on the show’s central premise that belief doesn't spare people from grief, and church leaders are not exempt from falling apart.

“There’s pressure just in society, whether you’re a pastor or a carpenter,” Scott Foley told The Christian Post. “We all like to show strength and show that we’re fine, that we can handle whatever comes our way. And the truth is, we can’t.”

Foley stars as Malcolm, a widowed pastor raising three children while trying to lead an Atlanta congregation through his own unprocessed grief. For the 53-year-old actor, the role provided an opportunity to explore the often-unspoken loneliness of spiritual leadership. That social distance and well-documented loneliness pastors experience, Foley suggested, often forces pastors into performative strength.

“Pastors have a really tough time,” he said. “People aren’t necessarily themselves around pastors. They stand up a little straighter. They clean up their language. They’re on their best behavior. And it’s hard to break through that. It’s hard to make a friend when people don’t treat you normally.”

For decades, Hollywood has struggled to portray Christian life without resorting to caricature, either the sanctimonious hypocrite or the moral exemplar. “It’s Not Like That,” executive produced by “Jesus Revolution” director Jon Erwin, attempts to fill that gap.

Created by Ian Deitchman and Kristin Robinson, both veterans of “Parenthood,” the eight-episode series follows Malcolm after the death of his wife. In addition to being a pastor, he’s a father navigating adolescent grief, romantic loneliness and the humiliation of not having answers. 

Deitchman and Robinson said the show’s ability to hold grief and joy at the same time comes directly from lived experience. As painful as loss can be, they noted, humor often emerges alongside sorrow.

“I just think those things go together,” Deitchman said. “It’s not one or the other. From our personal experience, you draw on both for this show. It’s kind of what we’ve always written, pulling from our own lives. I think it’s what everybody experiences. … That’s just the reality of what it is to be human. And we think that’s universal. That’s really where that comes from.”

Early in the series, Malcolm tells his congregation that he’s struggling and asks for help, a scene Robinson said was essential to portraying pastors as fully human, not idealized spiritual figures. It was also a moment, the duo added, drawn from real-world conversations with pastors.

“We wanted a sense of people appreciating that even as a pastor, even as somebody who is a faith leader, they, too, need someone to lean on,” Robinson said. “It is very human to express that. The fact that he does that and looks to his congregation for support, we think that captures the human experience.”

“It was really important to us to show Malcolm as a pastor who is not some kind of idealized perfect persona,” she added. “He’s a human being also, and to show that side of him, we felt like that hadn’t really been explored before.”

“A very good friend of mine from college is a pastor,” Robinson said. “We had long conversations about his life in general, not just in front of his congregation, and that was illuminating.”

That emphasis on family extends to Lori, played by Erinn Hayes, a divorced single mother whose life remains intertwined with Malcolm’s. Lori was best friends with Malcolm’s late wife, Jenny, and her loyalty to that memory complicates her growing closeness to him.

In a previous interview with CP, Hayes described Lori as someone perpetually caught between obligations to her children, to her grief and to promises made before everything changed.

“You see Lori really trying,” Hayes said. “She’s trying to honor her friend and explain to her own children who she knows she should be prioritizing, but she’s trying to balance all of it.”

“It’s Not Like That” highlights that faith doesn't tidy life into solvable equations, and belief can exist alongside unresolved pain.

J.R. Ramirez, who plays David, Lori’s ex-husband and the father of her two children, told CP that he believes the show’s realism is its greatest strength.

“This guy is messy, but he’s a good man,” Ramirez said of his character. “He wants to be a good father, but he’s just trying to figure it out.”

Ramirez, who emphasized that faith is important in his own life, emphasized that the series captures the idea that effort doesn’t always guarantee success.

“All you can do is show up,” he said. “Be present. And accept that you’re going to mess it up sometimes.”

The show’s commitment to grace as a lived necessity is central to the mission of Wonder Project, which has found unexpected mainstream success with projects like “House of David” and “The Chosen.” 

Wonder Project CEO Kelly Merryman Hoogstraten, who launched the platform alongside Erwin, told CP that “It’s Not Like That” is part of a generational hunger for stories families can watch together without disengaging from reality.

“I think about shows like ‘Family Ties,’ ‘Friday Night Lights,’ ‘Gilmore Girls,’” she said. “Stories full of hope that also recognize challenge and transformation.”

As a mother, Merryman Hoogstraten said her approach is guided by what she wants her children to see and discuss after the credits roll.

“I want to show them that life is messy,” she said. “That we make mistakes. And then ask, what does recovery look like? What does it look like when anxiety is ruling your brain instead of joy? When friendship is hard?”

“I don’t want to be the best faith entertainment story,” she added. “I want to be the best entertainment story.”

Foley added that “It’s Not Like That” reminds audiences that people of faith are still people, carrying grief they cannot outrun and responsibilities they cannot perfectly fulfill. It highlights a pastor who doesn't pretend to be whole, he added, and assures audiences that there is always hope, even in the darkest circumstances.

“I hope that people, when watching this show, will be encouraged to understand that it's normal to grieve, that we all deal with grief, we all deal with loss, we all deal with love and coming back and finding ourselves through it,” Foley said. “And if they can see that in that show, in this show, we've succeeded in our jobs.”

The series also stars Caleb Baumann (“Parish”), Cary Christopher (“Days Of Our Lives”), and newcomers Leven Miranda, Cassidy Paul and Liv Lindell. 

The show is now streaming on Wonder Project, with new episodes rolling out weekly.