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Mom's Valentine's Plans and the Lessons Learned

Seeing my mom's visits as an intrusion, I almost missed the opportunity to collect a treasured memory.
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It was a routine annoyance that had me gritting my teeth as I hung up the phone with my mom. Another Valentine's Day and my mother was coming to join us.

Didn't she realize it was a day for couples—not necessarily a couple and their mom?

But ever since the arrival of her granddaughter, she planned her traveling sales route to hit our city on Valentine's Day.

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So, Mom made reservations for a lovely Valentine's Day dinner—just the four us. Not a romantic candlelit table for two. Sigh.

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We slid into the booth at one of Mom's favorite spots, and she immediately regaled us with stories from her traveling road adventures. As I listened and watched her animated gestures, I thought about all the miles she drove. Her new career had given her financial security, but now she lived in random motels along Interstate 5—far from her woodland cabin she loved.

Her life hadn't been easy, but she never let life's setbacks keep her from making her Valentine's visits. She'd always bring a colorful new children's book and come equipped with a special art project designed for little fingers. The next day, I watched her back out of our driveway, heading towards another city on her route. I imagined that next Valentine's Day she'd find her way back.

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I was wrong. There would be no more Valentine's Day intrusions. Now she was battling cancer and losing. It was my turn to drive miles and visit her. Those miles gave me lots of time to think about the timing of her visits, and why they were so important. I could count those Valentine's Day visits on one hand. And there's not nearly enough memories to make that enough.

It's been so long since my last Valentine's Day with her that I strain to recall her words, her animated stories, and the art projects she loved to bring. I wonder if Mom suspected I sometimes gritted my teeth? I hope not, because those Valentine's Day visits became one of my life's treasures.

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