COVID-19 makes every leader a psychologist
Whether realizing it or not, every leader now has the added job of being a psychologist.
Everyone is in crisis because the foundations of our human buildings have been shaken.
One foundation of our human buildings is our sense of connectedness. Our relational connections are knitted together, like a fabric. People who are rooted and grounded have brains that work better. But what does a pandemic do? It blows apart all of our connections, directly affecting the wiring of humans.
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Another foundation is structure. When you build a house, you build a slab and then you frame it. Humans need to have a frame. We operate around structure. Structure is time and place for how we function. We have routines and schedules. God wired people’s brains to work in a structure — days, nights, Sabbath, festivals, all of this has a routine.
If we don’t have routine, our physiological and neurological systems get booted. If people don’t have routine and structure, the brain goes crazy.
A final foundational human element is control. Our brains are designed to have choices. God meant us to have self-control and choices. But what happens in a pandemic? No choices! All of our choices have gone away.
So now we’ve found ourselves in a context where we’ve lost our foundations of connectedness, structure and control. As a leader and a human, you are now called upon to lead in ways that are proactively and strategically intersecting these parts of how a human is constructed — making you something of a psychologist.
You’ll have to get intentional about this, and you can start by thinking about your own concentric circles of relationship — personally and professionally. Think about the people that fuel you, and then work your way out. This will help you develop a sort of “dosage” schedule for your connectedness that you can then apply to your employees and your stakeholders. Bring some of what fuels you into your relationships with them to help them feel connected in their respective roles.
Another one of your biggest roles as a leader is communicating all of this clearly. By helping people know that you understand what they are going through, you can increase that sense of connection. Be empathetic, clear and authentic. Talk about who you’re connected to in the larger network, which helps instill confidence and lets people know they are a part of a bigger picture. You’ll also need to tell people about a longer narrative. Recognizing that this is just a scene in a long movie helps the brain to function more normally.
Once you’ve instilled that sense of connectedness, you need to have some meetings and a sense of routine to help bring back structure. You can do that by getting together and sharing short term and long term priorities. Define roles and responsibilities around the team very clearly and talk about what to expect from each other. Mutually agreed upon agreements form a structure and provide boundaries which contribute to better human function.
There are 10,000 things we can’t control right now. I recommend you write them down and give yourself 10 minutes to worry about them. And then lead your team to say, “God, we can’t do anything about these things. We surrender them to you.”
Then, take a look at the things you can control. Make a list of the small steps everyone can take to drive the needle. Sometimes our brain says we can’t do anything, when in reality we can. We need to be reminded of the things we can control around our priorities, and how we can come alongside and serve others. This helps us not to feel so powerless amidst the things we can’t control.
It’s important to talk to your team about what is going right and let your team process this, too. It changes the brain chemistry and gives an emotional boost when people feel like they are doing something that adds value.
While we are emphasizing the good, we do need to be realistic about confronting what is hard. Encourage your team to talk about what that means for each of them and ask them how they are really doing with it.
During these difficult times, there really should not be much difference between a team meeting and a small group meeting. Pray and read Scripture together, taking the time to process. Share about what helps you to thrive and suggest some relaxation exercises that might work for others.
Through all of this, you can see how leaders are being called upon to function as psychologists in how we are striving to help people feel connected, structured and in control — such foundational elements to our human buildings.
Finally, it helps us all to remember that this is just a frame in a larger movie, and soon we’ll go into the next frame. We can feel empowered to do what we can right now to set up the rest of the movie. And never forget that at the end of the movie, we know who wins.
Editor's Note: The above was taken from a recentGlobal Leadership Networkwebinar in theGLSnext Event Seriesin which Dr. Cloud addressed “Trailblazing in Uncertainty.”
Dr. Henry Cloud is an acclaimed leadership expert and psychologist who draws on his extensive experience in business, leadership consulting, clinical psychology and church ministry. He is a New York Times best-selling author with more than 45 of his books selling over 20 million copies.
